By the beard of Herman Melville

A partial list of all the euphemisms Herman Melville ever used for beards:

• the crop
• suburbs of the chin
• homeward-bounders
• fly-brushes
• long, trailing moss hanging from the bough of some aged oak
• love-curls
• Winnebago locks
• carroty bunches
• rebellious bristles
• redundant mops
• yellow bamboos
• long whiskers
• thrice-noble beards
• plantations of hair
• whiskerandoes
• nodding harvests
• viny locks
• the fleece
• fine tassels
• goatees
• imperials
• sacred things
• admiral’s pennant
• manhood
• muzzle-lashings

Source: unknown. I've had this as a saved email draft since February 2011. Who I meant to send it to still remains unclear.