I'm At Least Three of These

Additional Myers-Briggs Personality Types

Unfeeling Uncaring Judging Screaming (UUJS)

Lurking Touching Hurting Regretting (UTHR)

Lying Denying Confessing Lying (LDCL)

Smoking Dancing Laughing Fucking (SDLF)

Moping Whining Crying Leaping (MWCL)

Loving Buying Owing Impoverishing (LBOI)

Hating Marrying Abusing Divorcing (HMAD)

Running Swimming Boxing Fencing (RSBF)

Writing Drinking Drinking Drinking (WDDD)

Opening Sniffing Tasting Questioning (OSTQ)

Eating Sleeping Videogame Playing (ESVP)

-by James Hannaham

for McSweeney's

The Last Line of The Great Gatsby

The last line of The Great Gatsby only makes sense if you’re over 30, or better yet, even older than that. Being “une femme d’un certain age” has few benefits, but here’s one of them: books with complex plots revolving around obsession, and drinking, and self-delusion, and accidents make more sense. You have to be old enough to have a past, and to have tried to do things that did not pan out. You have to know in your bones from experience that uncontrollable shit happens.

-Elizabeth Bastos

Chicago Window Displays, 1950s - 1970s

via Guttersnipe City

all of the strings

portland cello project covers kanye west's all of the lights

Up Against It

It’s the way they cannot understand the window
they buzz and buzz against, the bees that take
a wrong turn at my door and end up thus
in a drift at first of almost idle curiosity,
cruising the room until they find themselves
smack up against it and they cannot fathom how
the air has hardened and the world they know
with their eyes keeps out of reach as, stuck there
with all they want just in front of them, they must
fling their bodies against the one unalterable law
of things—this fact of glass—and can only go on
making the sound that tethers their electric
fury to what’s impossible, feeling the sting in it.

-Eamon Grennan

It's the Freakin Weekend

Someone who appears to be Actual John Darnielle gives us 100 reasons why "Ignition - Remix" is so damned great, including the fact that

10. Therefore, R Kelly has won and the terrorists have lost.

Diagnosing Home Alone

"Assuming Harry doesn't lose the hand completely, he will almost certainly have other serious complications, including a high risk for infection and 'contracture' in which resulting scar tissue seriously limits the flexibility and movement of the hand, rendering it less than 100 percent useful. Kevin has moved from 'defending his house' into sheer malice, in my opinion."

 - A medical professional weighs in on the seriousness of injuries sustained by the Wet Bandits in Home Alone (1990).

Never a Lovely So Real

“If you feel you belong to things as they are, you won’t hold up anyone in the alley no matter how hungry you may get. And you won’t write anything that anyone will read a second time either.”

-The Believer profile on Nelson Algren. The story of Algren living in New Orleans, surviving on chicory coffee and bananas while making a living printing counterfeit gift certificates is especially worthwhile.

Rich Blocks, Poor Blocks

Curious about the distribution of income across your community/neighborhood/city/state? This map uses information from the American Community Survey to put pretty colors on things you already know.

Dream Houses: Lite

woman builds her guitar-playing daughter an intricate dollhouse inside a guitar, thus making my mom look like utter shit (sorry mom)

Dream Houses

the de menil family's private home, via austin kleon

How to Think Like Holmes

Although much pop neuropsychology is just self-help gussied up to look like science, the book Mastermind: How to Think Like Sherlock Holmes is the kind of self-help I wouldn't mind getting anyway. In a promotional article on Slate, the author unpacks just one cognitive trait Holmes seemed to display: focused attention in place of non-directed thinking. Or, as Holmes rebuked Watson, "You see, but you do not observe." In order to truly transmute our experiences into observations, we must learn to tune out distractions and live mindfully in the present.

Konnikova's own observation - that the myriad distractions modern thinkers must combat helps unfocus and distract us - is not new. But the study she cites, showing that "a wandering mind is an unhappy mind", gives pause for thought. Dividing your attention between work, email, facebook and random Wikipedia look-ups may not just be bad for productivity. It also seems to degrade your intellectual capacity and your emotional buoyancy.

All this to say that I'd love to read this book, and that I should probably get back to work right now.

A Pickpocket's Tale

• “It’s all about the choreography of people’s attention,” he said. “Attention is like water. It flows. It’s liquid. You create channels to divert it, and you hope that it flows the right way.”

• “Grift sense is the closest thing to a sixth sense we have,” he told me. “It’s stepping outside yourself and seeing through the other person’s eyes, thinking through the other person’s mind, but it’s happening on a subconscious level.” He went on, “I can analyze how I do things, but the actual doing it—when the synapses just start firing—I can’t explain.”

- my favorite quotations from Adam Green's profile of Apollo Robbins, a gentleman pickpocket, available for free in its entirety

WBEZ explores what a Chicago accent sounds like, where it comes from, and where it's going.

Weekend Feels

Boys Are Back in Town/Ignition (Remix) - The Mountain Goats

May your weekend feel like this song - full of relentlessly building excitement and harmonious friends, with a surprise twist somewhere in the middle.

Countdown

Beyonce + Snuggies has never made so much sense.

When you're done with this, check out the side-by-side comparison to the official video. What a meticulous LOL (Labor of Love). What a spot-on parody. What an incredible jungle-themed living room.